Today’s presentation will be a Hybrid meeting with online and in-person options.
Join Zoom Meeting https://us06web.zoom.us/j/971381033
Join us in-person at The 519, 519 Church Street, Rm 301
“What do Adult Children owe to their Parents?”
Presented by Catherine Francis from Tanya Long’s idea
All of us were once children. Many of us became adult children of aging parents. Many of us have our own adult children. And some of us are both at the same time, struggling with how to take care of both our aging parents and our grown children. What do we owe our aging parents? What do our children owe us now and what will they owe us when we are no longer able to live independently. For me, these are daily issues and struggles.
For an objective discussion of these issues I have turned again to ChatGPT.
"The question of what adult children owe their parents is often influenced by cultural, moral, and personal values. There are several perspectives on this topic:
### 1. **Cultural Expectations**
In many cultures, particularly in collectivist societies (such as many parts of Asia, Africa, and Latin America), adult children are expected to care for their parents in old age, providing emotional, financial, and sometimes physical support. Filial piety is deeply ingrained, emphasizing respect, duty, and gratitude toward one’s parents for the sacrifices made during childhood.
### 2. **Moral and Ethical Considerations**
From a moral standpoint, some argue that adult children owe their parents gratitude, respect, and care in recognition of the time, energy, and resources their parents invested in raising them. However, this is sometimes tempered by the idea that obligations should be reciprocal: if parents did not provide a loving and supportive upbringing, some would argue that the adult children may not owe them the same level of care.
### 3. **Personal Autonomy**
Others take the position that, while it is important to maintain relationships and offer support, adult children are not inherently obligated to sacrifice their own well-being, career, or life goals to meet the demands or expectations of their parents. Adult children have their own lives to lead and cannot be expected to fill every need their parents may have.
### 4. **Legal Obligations**
In some countries, filial responsibility laws impose legal obligations on adult children to support their elderly parents financially if they cannot do so themselves. While these laws are not universally enforced, they reflect a societal view that there is a duty toward parents in their later years.
### 5. **Emotional and Practical Support**
Even if adult children do not feel obligated to provide financial care, there is often an expectation of emotional support and connection. This can include regular communication, providing advice, or assisting with decision-making in old age.
### 6. **Boundaries and Limits**
Many people believe that adult children owe their parents respect and a willingness to help within reasonable boundaries. If a relationship is toxic or harmful, some argue that adult children are within their rights to set limits, prioritize their mental health, or even sever the relationship."
While the answers from ChatGPT are somewhat bland, they touch on the interplay of cultural norms, personal values, and the quality of the particular parent-child relationships, and provide a good springboard for a lively discussion.